Does This Woman’s Diet Inspire or Infuriate You? | The Cupid Bow

Friday was most enjoyable for me. Off work for a few days, I decided to spend my downtime wisely and productively… By spending the majority of it in my pyjamas, watching re-runs of Friends and eating endless amounts of cheese on toast. My only exercise came in the form of switching between channel-flicking, to feed-scrolling. After finishing The One Where Joey Speaks French and waiting for The One Where Ross Is Fine, I took to Facebook to kill the three minutes of the advert break. Mid-scroll, I noticed that a Facebook friend had reposted an article from Elle.com online along with the comment “Oh, do f*** off and eat a sandwich” which had racked up an impressive amount of likes and comments. Obviously, I had to have a little nose. The article was written about Amanda Chantal Bacon (surname ironic, for reasons that will be apparent soon) who owns Hollywood’s “favourite” juice bar, Moon Juice. Amanda had revealed what her daily diet consists of which had sparked a (rather humourous) debate in the Elle.com comments section of the article, of which you can read in full here.

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Image credit: Amanda Chantal Bacon

I would have loved to have filmed my facial expressions whilst reading the article. I’m sure it would have portrayed a cyclical mix of awe, confusion and genuine dismay. Bacon’s diet is predominantly made up of foods that I have never even heard of, let alone be able to pronounce, and it appears I’m not the only one, judging by the conversation forming underneath the article. She starts her day at 6.30am with “some Kundalini meditation and a 23-minute breath set – along with a copper cup of silver needle and calendula tea.” I’m most intrigued by why it’s a precisely 23 minute breath set (couldn’t just round it up to 25 mins no?) but also by her choice of tea. Silver needle? Sounds painful. I’ll stick to Tetleys. At 8am she downs a “warm, morning chi drink containing more than 25 grams of plant protein, thanks to vanilla mushroom protein” (presumably from the ice cream forest) “and stone ground almond butter (what’s wrong with Lurpak?) “and also has the super endocrine, brain, immunity and libido-boosting powers of Brain Dust, cordyceps, resign, mac and Shilajit resin. I throw ho shou wu and pearl in as part of my beauty regime. I chase it with three quinton shots for mineralization and two lipospheric vitamin B-complex packets for energy”. Now I don’t know about you, but I didn’t understand any of that. To me, it just looked like a three year old has got hold of a board of Scrabble, put a load of letters together and Amanda has thought “yeah, that’ll do”. Someone also needs to tell her that she’s misspelt “tequila” for “quinton”.

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Image credit: Amanda Chantal Bacon

Continuing on with her morning after the school run, Amanda drinks “16 ounces of unsweetened, strong green juice”. She then follows it with “three tablespoons of bee pollen”  (I’m sorry, what now?) “and I’ll grab a handful of activated cashews” which seems to me to be the first thing she’s actually eaten – apart from the bee pollen, but I’m trying to get away from the image of Amanda gnawing away at a bee’s nest in my head. But what on earth are activated cashews?! What’s wrong with regular ol’ salty, honey-roasted (LAWD have mercy), lazy, slightly-undermotivated cashews? What kind of world do we live in now that even cashews are getting judged? IS THERE NO GOD?!

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Image Credit: Amanda Chantal Bacon

For lunch she has “zucchini ribbons with basil, pine nuts, sun-cured olives and lemon” FINALLY something I can level with. Except it’s been revealed in the comments section that she has someone else ribbon her zucchini for her. She has a zucchini-ribboner. What is life? “I often alternate this with my other staple lunch: a nori roll with umeboshi paste, avocado, cultured sea vegetables and pea sprouts. This is my version of a taco”. Let’s just say a little prayer for tacos everywhere, as I just heard a flurry of little taco cries. I’d also like to know to which level the sea vegetables have been cultured. I wonder what inspirational books they have read recently?

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Image Credit: Amanda Chantal Bacon

Now her afternoon snack is something I can definitely get on board with. “Coconut yoghurt, dried figs, walnuts, apricots (sic) and a chunk of raw dark chocolate”. I’m almost drooling at the sound of this, until I get to the next line where she reveals she “ferments big batches of coconut yoghurt” and spikes her chocolate with “maca and any other medicinal herb I’m focusing on”. Girl have you not heard the phrase “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”? I thought we were onto a winner. Moving onto her evening meal, she ventures to Shima in Abbot Kinney which is apparently her three year old Rohan’s favourite restaurant. That’s good work that. I can hardly get my nephew of the same age to swallow a green bean.

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Image Credit: Amanda Chantal Bacon

Bacon has a “micro cilantro and daikon, and a delicate broth of mushrooms and herbs”. So not only does her dinner consist of a meal that would put any green salad to shame, she has it in microscopic portions. And I’m not sure about that “broth” too. Looks suspectedly like a mojito (God forbid). After yoga, Amanda and Rohan make a batch of “almond milk and vanilla chia pudding for the next morning at bedtime” which is actually a very sweet Mother and son activity. Most parents spend about an hour trying to prive their tablet out of their littluns paws whilst wrestling them into pyjamas. So kudos to you Amanda!

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Image Credit: Amanda Chantal Bacon

Amanda finishes off her day at 11pm with a product from her own juice bar called Heart Tonic which is compromised of a medley of “heirloom raw cacao, reishi and chaga mushroom, sprouted brown rice protein and coconut oil.” It’s got nothing on my midnight Nesquik chocolate milkshake though, Amanda. Nothing.

So there you have it. Jaws well and truly cemented to the ground? Is it just me, or did you miss the part where Bacon actually consumes any food? Each to their own of course, and I could probably partake in a little bit of this with a Vegas trip looming in the coming months and a few stubborn pound which just REFUSE to move, but reading this has left me feeling absolutely starving. I also imagine it must cost a few bob to be able to source all these fancy ingredients. I can’t help but feel a little fascinated however… To how different and diverse diets can be from one person to the other. Would this diet inspire you to try something completely different, consuming foods you could never in a million years find in your nearest supermarket, or do you find it pretentious – placing even more pressure on women (and men) to look after our bodies better and think twice about what we’re putting in our mouths? I’m on the fence with this one, still wondering what bee pollen would actually taste like. Discuss in the comments below! I’m off to spend some quality time with the Dominos pizza that’s just arrived.

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